My father was the most racist person I knew as a child - he didn’t like black people, but also on his list were Indians and Greeks and Chinese, so it might surprise you when I tell you his best friend was a black woman.
This story of your letter is so needed right now. Yes, yes and yes. We must challenge ourselves to be bold in our truth- do not postpone the things we want to say out of love and integrity. Now, more than ever, the world needs that energy released from us, even if it is one letter, one word, one gesture at a time.
Thank you, Laura. I’m guilty of wanting responses and agree with what you write. I do, however, find sometimes my direct & honest ways don’t sit well with some people and I can appreciate that too. I definitely believe that we don’t always know what’s going on with people and it’s best not to make assumptions. this last sentence is a reminder to myself.😄❤️
There is no way to know how many hearts one's words may touch. Like a stone, either rough or polished, tossed into a pond, our words ripple out through the waters of life. How human to want validation; I am certainly not immune. This story is a good reminder for me to share my words without condition or expectation. Thank you.
I forgot to comment also that despite your dad‘s general prejudice, it’s great that he was able to get past that with Vonnie and that they had a friendship, and that her husband let you know that she did see the letter, etc.
Beautiful and so true. Bless you, Vonnie, and bless her husband, and bless your whole family and you, too. We all need that blessing that protects us from the prison of validatioin.
It was a simple two-word message of love. How odd that I just commented and it didn't show up in the thread of comments... can hope it reached you. Your Vonnie story, coupled with this current experience, is a reminder to comment and post anyways, even if what I share doesn't appear to have any reach, not let hinder sharing my love with the world, whether visible to others or not. Should this happen again, I'll tell you in person.
Your letter gave Vonnie solace for years. Today that letter moved many of us who needed to hear that validation, that what we do with sincerity matters, even if it is only meaningful to us.
Laura, once again your writing touches me deeply...apologizing for a world where you had to apologize... I love the way you see the world and honor story. Just wow.
Words can be powerful Laura, yours just unexpectedly gripped and squeezed my heart hard by jolting bleak memories but I also remembered the astonishing conclusion to them. Upon reading how your Dad's pleasurable interests were taken away from him I remembered how my ex husband did the same, he made me sell my flute to pay bills, rehome my beautiful budgerigar because the bird had closely bonded to me, refused to let me do a second stained glass course when seeing how much I loved the medium. I stupidly stayed in the soul destroying marriage for 25 years thinking he'd improve, thinking it was the best thing to do for our two sons but giving up I finally divorced him in 1991, he died in 2017.
Comes the astonishing event last November which carried an unsought but delicious validation (I'll freely admit that my fierce Celtic genes rejoiced!) .... my beloved second husband John passed 3 years ago, he was everything my ex was not, he was loving, sensitive, supportive of my glasswork, a truly beautiful soul .... I had booked a phone reading from a medium in London who knew nothing about me, hoping that my John would come through - as the reading unfolded I sat there, in the middle of the night in NZ, frozen and also increasingly white hot furious as the medium said there was a very dark energy with him, a man seeking my forgiveness because his soul could not move on, couldn't advance unless I would release him with my blessing - he realised I was far above him when he thought he was superior and he was so sorry for all he'd put me through. Ye Gods my reaction was shockingly visceral after 34 years of thinking I'd exorcised all the trauma of that dreadful marriage, I told the medium that truthfully yes I could find forgiveness so I could let it all go also I felt a twinge of pity for his tortured soul - at that point my ex faded and my mother came through so strongly with words of love and lovely memories - you are correct Laura when you write "trust the love and the words you put into the world will find the heart that needs them" your words found me today and my beloved mother's love found me not only in this world but also from the afterlife.
This life can be truly incredible, my Mum used to say "truth will out" - how right she was even if it takes many years.
Thank you for sharing this incredible story! It's proof that I say we can have resolution with someone after they have died. Wonderful story, I was holding my breath through it! Some people are so threatened by another's passion - I have had those men every now and then and had to move on. As I mention in another essay "love is not small"....and it doesn't want to keep us small. Thank you!
You're welcome Laura, I was concerned that I was bletherin on for far too long but must admit it felt good to get those words out of my mind and onto the page. I just reread your "Don't Let Anyone Keep you Small" your words are so sadly familiar to how I felt in that first marriage. I returned to glasswork, revealed in it and John's lovely comments on same, plus was thrilled with many commissions; my sons showed some of my work to their father and I was shocked when he sent me a message congratulating me on my progress, creativity, how beautiful the work was ..... I managed - JUST - not to tell him to get fucked especially when thinking how far I would have come had he not prevented me from doing the work for years ... hey ho it was grist to the mill as all was resolved in the end, he was the yardstick by which I could measure my great good luck in my wonderful John.
On Christmas Eve I sat in the hospital beside my elderly neighbour who was dying, until her son's arrived. She never knew I was there. But I did...
This story of your letter is so needed right now. Yes, yes and yes. We must challenge ourselves to be bold in our truth- do not postpone the things we want to say out of love and integrity. Now, more than ever, the world needs that energy released from us, even if it is one letter, one word, one gesture at a time.
Thank you, Laura. I’m guilty of wanting responses and agree with what you write. I do, however, find sometimes my direct & honest ways don’t sit well with some people and I can appreciate that too. I definitely believe that we don’t always know what’s going on with people and it’s best not to make assumptions. this last sentence is a reminder to myself.😄❤️
There is no way to know how many hearts one's words may touch. Like a stone, either rough or polished, tossed into a pond, our words ripple out through the waters of life. How human to want validation; I am certainly not immune. This story is a good reminder for me to share my words without condition or expectation. Thank you.
Lovely, powerful, and poignant.
I forgot to comment also that despite your dad‘s general prejudice, it’s great that he was able to get past that with Vonnie and that they had a friendship, and that her husband let you know that she did see the letter, etc.
Beautiful and so true. Bless you, Vonnie, and bless her husband, and bless your whole family and you, too. We all need that blessing that protects us from the prison of validatioin.
Like most of your gorgeous, deeply touching and profoundly moving pieces of writing, this made me both smile and cry. 🙏🏽
Yes, until we were older, we used to think, based on how Mom referred to her, her name was YourFathersBlackFriendVonnie.
It was a simple two-word message of love. How odd that I just commented and it didn't show up in the thread of comments... can hope it reached you. Your Vonnie story, coupled with this current experience, is a reminder to comment and post anyways, even if what I share doesn't appear to have any reach, not let hinder sharing my love with the world, whether visible to others or not. Should this happen again, I'll tell you in person.
Love anyways.
Your letter gave Vonnie solace for years. Today that letter moved many of us who needed to hear that validation, that what we do with sincerity matters, even if it is only meaningful to us.
Just what I needed today. Thank you.
Laura, once again your writing touches me deeply...apologizing for a world where you had to apologize... I love the way you see the world and honor story. Just wow.
Words can be powerful Laura, yours just unexpectedly gripped and squeezed my heart hard by jolting bleak memories but I also remembered the astonishing conclusion to them. Upon reading how your Dad's pleasurable interests were taken away from him I remembered how my ex husband did the same, he made me sell my flute to pay bills, rehome my beautiful budgerigar because the bird had closely bonded to me, refused to let me do a second stained glass course when seeing how much I loved the medium. I stupidly stayed in the soul destroying marriage for 25 years thinking he'd improve, thinking it was the best thing to do for our two sons but giving up I finally divorced him in 1991, he died in 2017.
Comes the astonishing event last November which carried an unsought but delicious validation (I'll freely admit that my fierce Celtic genes rejoiced!) .... my beloved second husband John passed 3 years ago, he was everything my ex was not, he was loving, sensitive, supportive of my glasswork, a truly beautiful soul .... I had booked a phone reading from a medium in London who knew nothing about me, hoping that my John would come through - as the reading unfolded I sat there, in the middle of the night in NZ, frozen and also increasingly white hot furious as the medium said there was a very dark energy with him, a man seeking my forgiveness because his soul could not move on, couldn't advance unless I would release him with my blessing - he realised I was far above him when he thought he was superior and he was so sorry for all he'd put me through. Ye Gods my reaction was shockingly visceral after 34 years of thinking I'd exorcised all the trauma of that dreadful marriage, I told the medium that truthfully yes I could find forgiveness so I could let it all go also I felt a twinge of pity for his tortured soul - at that point my ex faded and my mother came through so strongly with words of love and lovely memories - you are correct Laura when you write "trust the love and the words you put into the world will find the heart that needs them" your words found me today and my beloved mother's love found me not only in this world but also from the afterlife.
This life can be truly incredible, my Mum used to say "truth will out" - how right she was even if it takes many years.
Thank you for sharing this incredible story! It's proof that I say we can have resolution with someone after they have died. Wonderful story, I was holding my breath through it! Some people are so threatened by another's passion - I have had those men every now and then and had to move on. As I mention in another essay "love is not small"....and it doesn't want to keep us small. Thank you!
You're welcome Laura, I was concerned that I was bletherin on for far too long but must admit it felt good to get those words out of my mind and onto the page. I just reread your "Don't Let Anyone Keep you Small" your words are so sadly familiar to how I felt in that first marriage. I returned to glasswork, revealed in it and John's lovely comments on same, plus was thrilled with many commissions; my sons showed some of my work to their father and I was shocked when he sent me a message congratulating me on my progress, creativity, how beautiful the work was ..... I managed - JUST - not to tell him to get fucked especially when thinking how far I would have come had he not prevented me from doing the work for years ... hey ho it was grist to the mill as all was resolved in the end, he was the yardstick by which I could measure my great good luck in my wonderful John.
This is so potently true. And your writing is always so potently honest and loaded with lessons. Thanks Laura...